


Criminals Eat Cake

by daelighted



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Comedy, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Kissing, M/M, blushing emoji....
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-09-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 15:50:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26580148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daelighted/pseuds/daelighted
Summary: Jongdae lands himself a fake fiancé for the afternoon.
Relationships: Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Kim Jongdae | Chen
Comments: 18
Kudos: 82
Collections: Lil' Something Fest 2020





	Criminals Eat Cake

**Author's Note:**

> thank u to my two favourite little pistachio nuts 🥜 for reading this and assuring me that it’s worthy of publishing

"Baekhyun!"

Jongdae's eyes are glued to the flier in his hands when he strides into Baekhyun's apartment. He kicks the door shut with his heel, and nearly trips over one of Baekhyun's shoes on his way in.

"Dude— Baek. There's a free cake tasting thing for engaged couples at some new bakery downtown. Wanna pretend we're getting married and..."

The absence of Baekhyun's, well, general disposition for filling any silence with pure noise, has Jongdae finally tearing his gaze from the flier, fully expecting to see an empty apartment. Instead, he gets—

"No Baekhyun today, I'm afraid," Kyungsoo greets him from the kitchen. "Just me."

Kyungsoo, Baekhyun's roommate, looks completely worn out. Perched on a tall chair by the kitchen counter — his usual spot — one of his hands idly flicks at the space bar of his laptop, while the other is submerged in a bowl of chips. Stressed, clearly so, but not quite at that early greying hair stage yet.

His horn-rimmed spectacles are slightly askew too, perhaps from rubbing at his eyes. Jongdae fights the urge to walk over and gently fix them for him, to cup his face and tell him it's okay, he can breathe, it will be fine. But... there are boundaries...

Boundaries... and also Jongdae's big fat crush.

So he stays where he is, lets the corner of the kitchen counter dig further into his side.

Jongdae has only ever seen Kyungsoo like this one other time; the night he crashed at Baekhyun's place after a Coldplay concert, because his apartment was much closer to the venue and he hadn't felt like taking the midnight train. He'd found Kyungsoo, sitting once again in the kitchen chasing a deadline at 1 am. Frantically typing, he hadn't even noticed Jongdae slinking into the apartment. He hadn't even noticed Jongdae making fried rice as a late night snack, right in front of him. Not until a steaming bowl was placed under his nose.

Still, somehow, Kyungsoo manages to be the picture of radiance.

Kyungsoo was one of those people who looked gorgeous no matter how stressed out they were. It was so unfair! Even now, with his hair in complete disarray, eyes magnified behind his lenses, lips puffy from being chewed on— Kyungsoo was the cutest person alive.

"You said something about cake?"

"Oh, it's um, just this," Jongdae says. Handing Kyungsoo the flier, traitorous butterflies flutter in his belly when their fingers brush.

"Little Sprinkles... Must have just opened up. Sounds fun," Kyungsoo says after a while, handing the flier back to him.

He gets up, making the most endearing little noise when he stretches. Jongdae almost says _ 'oooh, biiiiiig stretch!'  _ the way he does when he sees a cat do the same. He stops himself just in time.

Kyungsoo looks down at himself. His faded, oversized sweater absolutely swallows his small frame, the tips of his fingers barely peeking through the sleeves.  _ Cute.  _ "Let me change into something more presentable. Then we can get going."

"Wait. What? Get going where?"

Kyungsoo stares at him. "To the bakery? Baekhyun's not here, so I'll go with you."

Jongdae's not sure what expression he's got on his face, but it pulls a breathy laugh out of Kyungsoo.

"No, Kyungsoo, you don't have to, that's okay," Jongdae finally says. He wracks his brain for more excuses. "I'm sure you have a lot of work to do anyway, it's no big deal. Really."

"It's fine," Kyungsoo waves a hand in dismissal. "I could use a break, to be honest. I don't know if you could tell, but I was close to losing my mind here. And, well, I like cake!"

He says it with so much enthusiasm, Jongdae decides to give up. Kyungsoo shuts his laptop and puts his notes and snacks away, not leaving any room for Jongdae to keep refusing his company.

"Besides, how hard could it be to pretend we're engaged, right?"

Fuck.

"Right." Jongdae forgot about that part. He's very rarely been out with Kyungsoo alone, and now he has to act like they're engaged? There is no way to survive this day.

Kyungsoo reappears moments later, donning a simple black form-fitting tee and acid washed jeans. He looks fresh, in that old-school, mismatched, messy kind of way. Jongdae is totally not reminded of 90s movie stars, and he definitely doesn't think about cheesy rom coms and being swept off his feet and being kissed under the moonlight.

Jongdae's head is completely empty when Kyungsoo smiles his luminous smile.

He looks down at his own cardigan and jeans and thinks how inadequate he must appear next to Kyungsoo.

"Ready?"

Was he? "Yeah, yeah. Let's go."

The elevator ride is... uncomfortable. Jongdae hopes the discomfort is one-sided, that the prolonged silence is only awkward in his head. He hates the thought of Kyungsoo suffering because of him.

Jongdae plasters himself to one side of the elevator, stupid anime-girl thumbs twiddling while Kyungsoo, with his eyes closed, leans his head against the wall. Neck stretched, throat exposed, all that sweet sweet space for kisses—

The shrill  _ ding!  _ of the elevator pulls him out of dreamland.

Kyungsoo leads him out the front door and not towards the parking lot. "Where'd you park your car?" Jongdae asks.

"I thought it would be nice to walk with you. The bakery isn't that far," Kyungsoo says. Such a simple statement, yet it makes Jongdae spiral, Kyungsoo's 'with you' replaying in his head like a mantra.

"Should we have some sort of story?" Kyungsoo says. He walks ahead, more familiar with the neighbourhood, while Jongdae stays a step behind to admire the sunlight playing with Kyungsoo's hair.

"What do you mean?"

"We're pretending we're engaged, right? Shouldn't we have some kind of background story in case someone asks?"

Jongdae almost sobs. He really hadn't thought this through. If he'd come with Baekhyun, they would have winged it. And they would have done a terrible job too, probably getting kicked out within minutes. "Did you have something in mind?"

"How about..." Kyungsoo purses his lips in thought. He gazes at him then, with such intensity that Jongdae almost loses his footing. "How about two friends who meet through their mutual friend. They like each other but are too afraid to say anything. Then one day, you make fried rice for me at 2 am in the morning because I'm stressed about school. And I was so touched by your actions that I confessed to you, right then and there." Jongdae holds his breath. Kyungsoo's eyes never leave his face. "We started dating and eventually... Yeah. How does that sound?"

Like it's too good to be true.

"That should work," Jongdae squeaks. "I definitely proposed, though."

"Okay, sure," Kyungsoo snorts, all the intensity from before dissipating into the corners of his smile.

They come to an abrupt stop in front of a quaint bakery tucked between a gift shop and a tattoo parlour. Jongdae salivates at the rows of vibrant cakes and pastries on display, silently praying his stomach doesn’t grumble in front of his long-time crush. That would be insanely embarrassing. 

Kyungsoo makes a noise like he’s impatient, and pulls at Jongdae's fingers until their hands are clasped together, making warmth bloom from his palm, all the way up to his ears.

From outside, Jongdae wasn't able to tell just how busy the place was. The bakery bustles with noise and activity, uniformed employees running about and serving customers standing around rows of makeshift tables. It was much smaller than he had expected too, but cosy. Homely. Jongdae relishes in the smell of sugar and cinnamon. It makes him think of Christmas mornings with his family, makes him feel all warm and gooey. Like breaking into a chocolate chip cookie, or being on the receiving end of one of Kyungsoo's smiles.

They walk up to one of the employees standing with a clipboard, a girl who couldn't be much older than a high school graduate.

"Hi, we're here for the cake tasting?" Kyungsoo says in his smooth, rich voice. Jongdae sees the girl practically melting. Very relatable. "The promotion for engaged couples?"

"Hi, welcome! Right this way, I'll try to find a space for four."

"Four?" Kyungsoo shares a look of confusion with Jongdae. "Actually, it's just the two of us. We're engaged."

"Oh. Oh, of course, yes. My apologies," the poor girl reddens. "Please, follow me."

She leads them to one of the corner tables nestled by the window where all the display cakes sit proudly. Only a handful of couples share their table too, and Jongdae sighs in relief. 

"Rings," Kyungsoo says when the server leaves.

"What?"

"We don't have our rings, see?" Kyungsoo pulls his hand out of Jongdae's grasp (much to his displeasure), to flex his fingers. No ring. "We'll have to check in with the jeweler, see when we can get them back from being resized."

"Huh?" Jongdae says rather dumbly.

"Nevermind," Kyungsoo mutters when he realises no one around them is actually listening. "Excited about the cakes?"

Before Jongdae could chime in with a 'fuck yeah', the same server from before appears beside them with a tray. "Hi. I'm so sorry about before. We have some extra cakes for you, just for you." She sets her tray down with a sheepish smile, bows and scuttles off before either of them could say anything.

"Well, alright then! More cake for us, hey?" Jongdae laughs.

He freezes when Kyungsoo sidles up close to him. "Seems like that got us some attention."

Jongdae turns around, confused about what he meant. True enough, a few couples from across the table were looking at them curiously.

Kyungsoo's hand crawls under his cardigan, his fingers playing a dangerous game with the hem of Jongdae's thin t-shirt. If Kyungsoo feels him shiver, he says nothing about it.

"You're very touchy," Jongdae murmurs. He's embarrassed about how breathy it sounds. "Never thought you were the clingy type, Kyungsoo."

"Just playing my part," Kyungsoo says. His eyes meet Jongdae's, flashing with mischief.

Right. His part.

This was all an act, after all.

Words failing him, Jongdae settles for clearing his throat and communicating with his eyes, gesturing to the cake. Kyungsoo laughs and pulls away to grab one of the plates. He digs right in.

"Pistachio? Really?"

"What's wrong with pistachio?" Kyungsoo asks. He sounds genuinely confused too, bless his soul.

"You have the taste buds of an old man," Jongdae laughs.

"Well, you have the fashion sense of one," Kyungsoo retorts, pulling Jongdae closer by his cardigan. He sticks his tongue out before taking another bite of cake. "Pistachio is good, you're just a hater. But you'll come around. I'm sure."

Jongdae tries to ignore the burning induced by Kyungsoo's touch, the heat spreading from the fingers still playing with the loose threads of his cardigan. "I'm not having pistachio cake at my wedding."

He tries it though, to prove how horrible it tastes. Taking a tiny bite from the corner — mostly frosting — Jongdae hums. Well, damn. But. No, he is not about to admit to Kyungsoo that it's actually delicious.

"It's my wedding too!" Kyungsoo says.

Jongdae swallows. He stares long and hard at Kyungsoo, who's gone back to finishing the pistachio sample, taking sneaky glances at the other patrons as if it was shameful to finish a whole piece of cake by himself in public. Jongdae doesn't know how to tell Kyungsoo he wasn't really thinking about their hypothetical wedding. Because they're just pretending right? It's not a big deal, so why would he bring it up? He doesn't want their conversation straying into dangerous territory.

He waves him off with a "yeah yeah," and pulls the next sample towards them. Plain old vanilla.

"So. What were you working on?" Small talk. Much easier to deal with. Nothing dangerous, like friends falling in love or pistachio cakes at weddings. "Back at the apartment, I mean."

"Research essay."

Jongdae coos at Kyungsoo's answer, not because of what he said, but because he said it with his cheeks puffy and full of cake.  _ Cute!!! _ Jongdae wants to drop on the floor and scream.

"You know," Jongdae starts. He tries to ignore the smidgen of icing on Kyungsoo's lip, the little smear he seems to be so unaware of. "I, uh, I really admire that about you."

“Hm?”

Jongdae isn’t sure what he’s saying. His mind is full of Kyungsoo. How his tongue keeps poking out to lick at his lips. How he keeps missing that bit of icing. Does he really not notice it? It was literally right there!

“Your drive. Your focus.” Jongdae murmurs watching Kyungsoo’s mouth form a pretty pout. “You’re so hardworking. I’ve always admired that about you… God, Kyungsoo, this is driving me crazy.” Without another thought, Jongdae swipes his thumb across Kyungsoo’s full bottom lip, wiping it clean. A little too late, he realises what he just did. “Sorry, uhm, you had icing on your—“

“That’s okay,” Kyungsoo clears his throat, eyes dazed. “Thank you.”

Jongdae doesn’t say anything else, stewing in his mortification. He pulls another plate of cake towards him, red velvet this time, and takes a big bite. Too big a bite. Tears well up in his eyes as he chokes and thinks about all his terrible life decisions. 

Kyungsoo thumps him on the back, once, twice, before settling on rubbing his hand up and down Jongdae’s spine. “Are you alright?” He asks. The concern is clear in his voice, but so is the laughter. 

“Fine,” Jongdae wheezes. 

They spend the rest of the afternoon finishing their cakes, revisiting the pistachio debate to the amusement of the couples around them, and even feeding each other— much to Jongdae’s embarrassment. Worse, when random couples ask questions about them, commenting on how “cute” they look together, and Kyungsoo eats it all up like a pro; pulling Jongdae closer by his waist, resting his head on Jongdae’s shoulder. Even squeezing his cheek at one point. 

Kyungsoo must... really love cakes….

By the time they leave, with full bellies and sugar dusted lips, the wind picks up and the sun hides behind sorbet clouds. They huddle together as they walk— for warmth, nothing more, Jongdae swears. 

Jongdae doesn’t realise their hands are still clasped together until Kyungsoo lets go to push the button for his floor. He doesn’t move to the opposite corner of the elevator like he did the last time, but even if he wanted to, he doesn’t think he physically could. Not with Kyungsoo staring at him like that. 

“Today was fun.” 

Kyungsoo hums. His gaze falls to Jongdae’s lips, then back up to his eyes. That same intensity from before, an electric kind of tension, fizzles between them. 

“We should hang out more.” Jongdae continues, trying to fill the silence, as if his rambling could keep some kind of distance between them. “We hardly ever hang out, you know, just the two of us.” 

Jongdae feels his back hit the wall behind him. He’d been moving back, unknowingly, as Kyungsoo kept crowding into his space. Kyungsoo looks at him, a strange glint in his eyes, a small smirk on his lips. He pulls Jongdae by his cardigan. 

“And I— Kyungsoo, wha—” 

“You’re so dense, Kim Jongdae.” Kyungsoo says, before tilting his head and pressing his lips against Jongdae’s. 

It’s sweet, at first, a warm brush of lips. Kyungsoo pulls away, sighs, and stares at Jongdae with so much fondness. Jongdae tests the waters, cups Kyungsoo’s face like he’s always wanted to, like he’s always dreamed about, and kisses him again. 

The seconds pass as they melt against each other. Jongdae forgets how to breathe when fingers tangle into his hair. Kyungsoo pulls him closer, kissing Jongdae like he’s  _ starving _ . 

“I can’t believe this,” Baekhyun greets them when the elevator doors open. They break apart to look at him, and somehow, Baekhyun seems more offended than shocked at his two best friends kissing. “I don’t see the two of you the whole day and suddenly you’re making out in my elevator?! Unbelievable!” 

Jongdae doesn’t have it in him to feel embarrassed, because when he looks over at Kyungsoo, with his mussed up hair and red, kiss-bitten lips, he sees the same happiness reflected on his face. 

"Here." Kyungsoo hands something to Baekhyun as he walks out. 

Baekhyun rifles through the colourful pieces of paper. "What the hell is this?"

"Cake vouchers. Consider it compensation for our future crimes."

"What crimes...?" Baekhyun squints his eyes when he looks at them.

Jongdae regards Kyungsoo with a tilt of his head; a silent question. That mischievous glint is back in his eye, but he says nothing more, squeezing his hand and giving him butterflies. Turning back to Baekhyun, though, he winks. 

"NO, KYUNGSOO?" Baekhyun screams at their retreating backs. "WHAT CRIMES?!"

**Author's Note:**

> lil’ something mods, you are all so sexc 😳


End file.
